Oftentimes, I speak with a bit of reverence towards the arcade games of yore, and with good reason. What gamer doesn't wax nostalgic about the quarter-munchers of his or her youth? Back in the day, a stop by the local laundromat to slap some slugs into a 1942 machine was akin to a visit to your favorite deity or the home of the neighborhood gorgeous naked housewife that handed out sandwiches to the children (every block had one)—it was something to savor. In today's fast and furious gaming world, that feeling gets lost in the shuffle, caught somewhere between people picketing against Grand Theft Auto's brain-melting abilities and people inexplicably purchasing Barbie Horse Adventures. A lot of games today are lavishly designed uber-epics that require a huge amount of time and patience to play. But what happens if you're just in the mood to injure things mindlessly? Fear not, fellow attention span-challenged gamers; the Game Boy Advance is your refuge from today's complicated e-frenzies. Now that you've got your GBA ready for some simple arcade pleasure, what do you fire up? If you're into the fast-paced adventures of two brothers savaging hordes of palette-swapped baddies, developer Million's brought back a blast from the 8-bit past - Double Dragon! Re-titled Double Dragon Advance for this GameBoy Advance run-through, the game stays close to the original Double Dragon formula while adding a few new things to the mix. The question is: Is the new stuff enough to improve a classic?

There's really not much to explain story wise, because everyone knows what the deal is there. The titular Double Dragons—brothers Billy and Jimmy Lee—are on a quest to rescue their kidnapped girlfriend, Marian, and in order to do so, they'll need to punch innumerable guys named Roper, Willy and The United Colors of Abobo in the face. One new thing for the GBA version is a moderately expanded plot; as well as rescuing your fine female friend, you also are called upon by her captors to trade a powerful martial arts tome for her life. This renovated story is told with excellently drawn 2D cutscenes, and they set the tone for the joyous violence to come… and joyous it most certainly is.

The original Double Dragon's claim to fame was the amazing amount of fighting moves you can perform as you trekked through warehouses, slums, city streets and the like. Of course, this version is no exception. As Billy or Jimmy Lee, you side-scroll your way through the same streets, slums and warehouses you always do in Double Dragon games and pummel baddies. However, the developers injected quite a bit of adrenaline into the fighting system. First off, there are a ton of new moves that the Lee brothers can inflict pain on the opposition with, like the thrust kick, clothesline and dash punch. You can also now mount foes that are knocked down and finish them off with some UFC-like brain blows, or just plain stomp them while they're prone. There are new weapons to go headhunting with, like nunchucks, kali sticks, axes and maces, and best of all, the collision detection is patched up properly, making laying into fools nothing but a pleasure. In a nod to the more contemporary beat-em-ups of the ‘90s and current generation, there's even a modest juggle combo system in place; that way, the Double Dragons can even show guys like Mike Haggar or Sion (from Final Fight and The Bouncer, respectively) a thing or two on the fine art of brutality.

The updates do a lot to revitalize the classic gameplay ideas, but just like in the ‘80s, it's playing with a buddy that really gets Double Dragon Advance swinging for the proverbial fences. With a link cable and a second a copy of the game, you and another warm body can tackle the game in proper fashion. If you're the antisocial type, you can play the single-player "Double Dragon Mode", which allows you to take alternating control of the Lee brothers. Why you'd want to do that, I'm not sure; the mechanics for that mode are a bit wonky, but it's there if you want it.

The visuals are completely redone for this GBA version of Double Dragon and they add a refreshing new vibrancy to the game. They're still based on the original arcade game, but with infinitely larger sprites and vastly improved animation, the difference is like night and day. The character sprites benefit from the GBA makeover; the Dragons look like the digital Bruce Lees they've always wanted to be, and the enemies manage to transcend typical brawler genericness with interesting designs and animations. (Check out the "Agent Smith" thugs in level two, who look mint.) The audio doesn't get improved as much as the graphics are, but they're nothing to write off; I mean, if whooping ass to the remixed sounds of stage three can't put a smile on your face, you might want to work on getting that surgery to pull the rod from your colon. Either that, or you just aren't as weird as I am. All of that notwithstanding, the music is still quite good.

So, what can we make of Double Dragon Advance? It's the granddaddy of side-scrolling beat-em-ups, and it's got a time-tested gameplay formula that makes it worth a quick play anyway. However, with all the new spit and polish applied to the game—courtesy of developer Million and the GameBoy Advance—Double Dragon Advance is worth a much longer look, even though it's still a short trip. If you're a fan of Abobo (which I know you all are, right?), or of unnecessary violence, or of the old-school, then this game is right up your alley. Double Dragon Advance might not last too long, but like a boozy night in Vegas or in Paris Hilton's bedroom, it's a blast the whole way through.